Anger Management Counselling to Regain Control & Improve Life

You, or someone within your family may be struggling with ongoing anger issues. Anger therapy or anger management counselling helps when you feel that you can’t manage your emotional outbursts – when anger flares up, causing problems in relationships, at work or simply in the way it affects your quality of life.

Anger can sometimes be an appropriate emotional reaction to a perceived injustice or a hurtful life event. At times it can even be the motivation to act, or to make changes to our life. However, if excessive or frequent bouts of anger are causing difficulties in your life, it is important to acknowledge that you can learn to manage your anger, and identify your anger triggers in a way that is appropriate and helpful for you.

Whether it’s showing your emotions in an aggressive verbal way, in physical behaviour, or even turning anger inward, counselling for Anger Management will give you valuable insights and tools to help you to explore your relationship with anger. Understanding and controlling your anger will lead you to a healthier and more fulfilling life.

1 in 13 people have inappropriate, intense, or poorly controlled anger.

Okuda et al (2018)

Anger: The Physical and Psychological Symptoms

Reflexions Counselling: Anger

Anger not only affects our emotional state but is also seen in physical and psychological symptoms. Recognising these symptoms helps in understanding the impact of uncontrolled anger on our overall well-being. For example, when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure increase, following release of your “energy hormones”, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. Here are some common physical and psychological signs of anger:

Anger is a commonly experienced emotion which can range from mild annoyance to rage.

APS

The Physical Symptoms of Anger

1. Increased Heart Rate: When anger escalates, our heart rate tends to rise, as the body prepares for a fight-or-flight response. This increased heart rate can lead to heightened arousal and physical tension.
2. Muscle Tension: Anger often causes muscle tension throughout the body, resulting in a clenched jaw, tightened shoulders, or a sensation of being on edge. Prolonged muscle tension can lead to headaches, backaches, and other physical discomforts.
3. Elevated Blood Pressure: Uncontrolled anger can cause a temporary increase in blood pressure. Consistently high blood pressure levels due to chronic anger can contribute to cardiovascular issues and other health problems.
4. Sweating and Flushed Face: Intense anger can trigger sweating and a flushed face as the body’s stress response activates the release of adrenaline.

The Psychological Symptoms of Anger:

1. Irritability and Frustration: Anger often manifests as increased irritability, making it challenging to remain calm or patient in everyday situations. Small inconveniences may trigger disproportionate reactions.
2. Intense Anger Episodes: Individuals with anger management issues may experience episodes of intense anger that seem overwhelming and difficult to control. These episodes can be triggered by specific events or situations.
3. Difficulty Concentrating: Anger can impair our ability to focus and concentrate. When consumed by anger, our thoughts may become scattered, making it challenging to engage in tasks or conversations effectively.
4. Heightened Stress and Anxiety: Uncontrolled anger is often accompanied by elevated stress levels and anxiety. The constant state of tension can have detrimental effects on our mental and emotional well-being.

Anger: How is It Expressed?

Anger is a genetically programmed response to threats; it inspires powerful, feelings and behaviours, which empower us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are feeling threatened either physically or psychologically. Anger has been a necessary survival instinct to our ancestors and is often expressed as aggression.

“When anger strikes, it feels like I’ve been engulfed by a tsunami of uncontrollable emotion.”

As stated ,whilst anger is a normal, usually healthy emotion, when it gets out of control and becomes destructive, it often leads to problems. You may recognise some of the symptoms of uncontrolled anger:

Uncontrolled Anger: Symptoms and Impact

• Aggressive or violent behaviour towards others.
• Acting in ways that are frightening or wild.
• Facing frequent aggression from others.
• Experiencing difficulties in personal relationships, both at home and at work.
• Struggling with attitude and behavioural issues.

Angry Feelings: Expressing, Supressing and Calming

People use both conscious and unconscious processes to deal with their angry feelings. The three main anger approaches are: expressing, suppressing, and calming.

1. Expressing your Anger assertively is the healthiest option. This means that you respectfully state what your needs are and work out how to get them met without hurting others.
2. Suppressing your Anger, which is then converted or redirected. This is where you hold your anger inside, stop thinking about it, and focus on something positive. The aim is to suppress your angry feelings and instead change them into constructive behaviour. The danger is that your feelings turn inwards which may cause you to experience depression, hypertension or high blood pressure.
   Passive-aggressive Behaviour where a person indirectly gets back at people, rather than confronting them directly is the the lack of ability to constructively express angry feelings. The characteristic behaviour is always putting others down, or being critical or cynical of others.
3. Calming Your Anger: Control both your internal (lowering heart rate, breathing) and your external response to anger which enables you to calm yourself down, and allows the feelings of anger to subside.

Unfortunately, these techniques are not perfect so need to be supplemented by other techniques to control your frustrations.

Anger Management: Best Treatment

There are various treatments available to help manage anger effectively. At Reflexions Counselling and Psychotherapy, Newcastle, we adopt an integrative therapeutic approach, matching interventions to your specific needs. Research shows that talking therapies, such as counselling, can be highly effective, especially when incorporating cognitive-behavioural techniques (CBT).

Anger Therapy: Does it Work?

There has been much research into Anger Management techniques and whether therapy works. Recent research demonstrated that therapy for anger management is effective if the focus is upon reducing the physical activation/arousal levels or by working understanding and modifying the response to triggering. Choosing therapy to cope with anger is a wise decision, demonstrating strength. Therapy offers the opportunity to develop new strategies, modify thought patterns, and transform behaviours. Through therapy, you can:

• Manage your reactions to trigger people or situations.
• Utilise strategies to combat low moods associated with anger.
• Explore your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours that contribute to anger.
• Learn techniques tailored to long-term success.
• Improve your communication skills, positively impacting anger management and other areas of your life.

In therapy, you are enabled to build upon your strengths which in turn empowers you to act and behave differently. Sorting out your anger allows you to move onto better relationships and simply a better quality of life.

But what if your frustrations are more complex – perhaps based upon difficult times when you were growing up? This is not unusual to find, and we have therapists who will be able to help you to resolve any underlying issues that you may have.

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”

Buddha

Anger Counselling: The Next Step

Recognising the impact of uncontrolled anger and seeking help through anger therapy is a significant step towards regaining control and improving your quality of life. At Reflexions Counselling and Psychotherapy, we are dedicated to assisting individuals in identifying and implementing effective techniques to manage anger.

Take the next step and reach out for support in your journey towards a healthier and more fulfilling life. If you are struggling with anger, contact us and arrange to talk to one of our therapists about anger therapy or anger counselling in Newcastle – Phone: 01915805080 or email.

Anger Management: Self-Help Resources

In addition to therapy, engaging in cardiovascular exercise, such as jogging or swimming, can be particularly helpful in managing stress and anger. Online resources are also available for further information and support. For example, Top Ten Tips for Anger Management will get you started.

There are a wide range of on-line resources and books available to support you in managing your anger. A small selection are listed below:
Mind
National Charity for all things mental health with a section on controlling anger.
BAAM (British Association of Anger Management)
tel. 0845 1300 286
A useful site for carers and those that have to deal with someone else’s anger. Contains lots of useful information.
Supportline
PO Box 1596, Ilford, Essex IG1 3FW
helpline: 01708 765 200
A helpline including domestic violence and sexual assault, bullying, child abuse, anxiety and depression.
Women’s Aid
helpline: 0808 2000 247
National charitable   organisation about   domestic violence.